It's the Thought that Counts, Right?
by MaidMikuruChan
Summary: Uhm. Dude, why'd a giant dildo come in the mail from Uncommon Goods, wishing us a merry Christmas from you and Courtney?" Yeah, Duncan wasn't very good at gift giving.


○ Happy Mother's Day, everyone!

● I do not own the _Total Drama... Series_

† Enjoy

* * *

**It's the Thought that Counts, Right?**

Duncan hated picking out gifts for others, no matter what the occasion was.

* * *

Duncan mindlessly scanned the _Kitchen & Dining_ section of _Amazon_ as he swivelled back and forth in his desk chair. Paying little mind to what was on the screen, he searched mugs and quickly clicked on the first result. He cocked his head to the side as he read the item's description:

_Ever have trouble holding your mug while trying to read or do any other task? Well, the_n _the __Lap Mug__ is the item for you! It fits comfortably between your thighs to ensure it will not spill when you need to use your hands for other things and don't have anywhere flat to set your drink. It's like the __Snuggie__ for liquids!_

"Sixteen bucks isn't so bad," he said with a shrug as he went to the external site and ordered a set, scheduling it for overnight delivery to Geoff and Bridgette's home. He rubbed his tired eyes as he shut down the computer, glad to be checking off the last person on his holiday gift list. Not to mention he had completely bypassed the need to visit on Christmas to deliver the gift after the numerous houses Courtney made them stop at.

The next day he had forgotten all about the gift, his mind completely set on his Xbox and how he had until Courtney came home to play it. After a few hours of mindless gaming, he had fallen asleep on the couch, only to wake up to a text from Geoff saying:

_Uhm. Dude, why'd a giant dildo come in the mail from _Uncommon Goods, _wishing us a merry Christmas from you and Courtney__?_

Duncan looked at his phone in confusion as he scrolled down to the picture that had been attached to the message. He let out a breath as he saw the mug he had bought Bridgette, instantly realising what Geoff had been talking about.

_It's supposed to be a mug. It's shaped like that at the bottom to fit between your legs when you sit._

_

* * *

_

Even when it wasn't a holiday, he couldn't get a present that wasn't just plain bad.

* * *

"_Duncan,_" Courtney said as soon as he picked up his phone, "_my parents want us over for dinner tonight. Can you get a hostess gift on your way out?_"

Duncan nodded as he spoke, "Sure thing, anything in particular?"

Courtney took a pause as she started her car. "_No; just get something simple, it doesn't have to be anything fancy._"

Duncan ran a hand through his mohawk as he ended the call and grabbed his keys. _Wine always works as a last minute hostess gift_, he thought to himself as he grabbed a bottle of _Château Margaux _from the wine rack and headed out the door.

As soon as he handed her mother the bottle of wine, he had realised there had been some kind of mistake, noticing the faked smile the woman wore and the glare his girlfriend had shot from the other side of the room.

When Courtney walked over to greet him she whispered, "You seemed to have forgotten my father is allergic to alcohol."

Duncan's mouth opened with a simple, "Oh."

"Yeah," Courtney whispered back.

"And that's why at the Christmas party there was no—"

"Yes," she interrupted.

"My bad," he whispered to her, getting him a quick, "we'll talk about it when we get home," look.

* * *

Duncan had even picked out the right gift a few times, but fate just never let him give them to the person.

* * *

Courtney smiled happily as she watched Duncan open the box that contained the latest _Roomba_ model from its box and placed it under his mother's dining room table. "This is positively the best gift ever. It will make her Mother's Day just wonderful."

Duncan smirked as he turned the machine on. "Yeah, I'll finally kick Delores's ass when it comes to gift giving."

Courtney shook her head as her boyfriend lifted himself from the ground. "You know, you shouldn't speak of your little sister like that."

"Delores is only twelve, she shouldn't be buying things, she should be colouring lame pictures from her activity books or making those stupid homemade cards," Duncan stated.

Courtney rolled her eyes. "One day you'll see that gift giving isn't a competition," she told him as they walked into the living room to meet the rest of his siblings.

Duncan stood there patiently as he waited for his gift to finish cleaning the dining room and come through the threshold between the two rooms. After all his siblings had given their gifts to Duncan's mother, he began to rock back and forth awkwardly on his heels, getting worried about what had gone wrong with the _Roomba_.

"Dakota! What cha got there, boy?" Delores called out; causing Duncan's attention to divert from his troubles to the husky dog his little sister was petting. "What did you eat that had so many wires?"

Duncan's eyes widened as he looked at the dog's mouth, the unlit screen of the _Roomba _hanging out of it. He let his head drop into his hand, not sure whether remembering the price of the gift or the sudden lack of a gift was depressing him more.

Courtney bit her lip and gave Duncan a small pat on the back, not wanting to think about what Duncan would have to go through to explain everything.

* * *

Duncan just couldn't win when it came to gifts. Ever.

* * *

○ "Get off your lazy ass and write, dammit! - 5 » 83%"

○ Done~

○ Oh! & you need to totally look up those Lap Mugs; I'm not kidding when I say they look like dildos.

† You have **read**, so nao you should click that snazzy looking button with the bubble-ish thing & _review_.

† Later; Maybe;

^ Suspenseful, eh?


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